In the magazine store, you’ll find all the weird mistakes on the back that we couldn’t fit anywhere else. Some may call it “filler”; we prefer “a full page to make horrible jokes, marginally related to the content of the magazine”.
We don’t have any pages on the web, but we still love terrible jokes – so welcome to our biannual Back Page feature.
It’s that time again folks! The Made-Up Games Show (MUGS) is back and boy is there a whole lot of life sims coming to Switch next year!
Now, back when we were young bucks, a sim was a slightly spooky avatar who spoke in a foreign language (Simlish) while they went about their day burning dinner, taking blurry showers, and accidentally setting babies on fire. So when we heard about the latest Line of Life sims, you can understand our confusion when there were a lot fewer.sul sul‘ and a lot more talk about pressure washers, goats and gas stations.
We can’t understand it, but perhaps you good readers will enjoy discovering all the so-called “life sim” games coming to Switch soon. Here’s the latest from MUGS:
Toast Buttering Simulator
Featuring four types of bread and enhanced realism with the Switch’s HD rumble (which you can feel as you spread across the brittle crusts), Toast Buttering Simulator is ready to bring the way of wheat to handheld games. After an impressive start on Steam, this Switch port adds difficulty levels so you can get to grips with innovative motion controls on a sturdy leaven before grappling with a slightly torn supermarket private label assortment.
Here’s the official word from the developers’ PR:
“Put your ovens on the grill because things are about to get buttery! The cafe is overflowing with toast orders and no bread is ready! Take on the challenge of buttering all the toast before the customers get mad. Remember, as the tension rises, the toast cools!”
Clock winding simulator
Time is of the essence in this clock winding extravaganza! The official announcement attempted to sell this as one time travel game what we suspect is technically true, but going back and forth every minute didn’t seem to go down well with the crowd.
The game appears to be in dire need of a patch to enable Joy-Con motion controls as it seems to be very analog stick heavy at the moment. However, pre-order bonuses include a neat clock-winding keychain badge and a time conversion table that will draw fans of the studio’s previous title. Watch cleaning simulator.
Disclaimer: The key cannot be used on pre-purchased watches and is for aesthetic purposes only.
“Take a break from playing The Sims play Play Sims!’ Hey, they might need to work on their tagline, but Fake EA-Type Company (FEAT Co.) really seems to have something to do with this game where you control an avatar playing Sims.
Dubbed Sims-meets-Sims, this simple sim shows you how to stream Sims while simulating life on a sleepy Sunday. With options for first and third person Sims sim, you now have more viewing options than ever while controlling your avatar to play the hit life sim.
Check out the following list of FEAT Co. game features:
– Create your ultimate gaming setup: With over 8 customizable desktops and screens, your take on playing Sims will seem more realistic than ever!
– Ignore your avatar’s real problems: Overdue bills and stained coffee mugs pile up on your desk the longer you play Sims Sim. Take a break to do the dishes and see your family, or continue to push your avatar to its disgusting limits!
– Calendar settings: You can see how long you’ve been neglecting your worldly duties, or turn off the daily counter if you want to play Sims in peace.
Fountain Pen Refill Simulator
Something like a spiritual continuation of Pencil sharpener simulator, Fountain Pen Refill is a throwback to the classics of the life sim genre, reimagined in glorious HD thanks to the developer’s work in Unreal Engine 5.
A variant of standard pen refill simulations such as Biro explosion and Don’t smear the Sharpie!, Fountain Pen Refill ups the ante as the Switch’s gyro control directly affects the flow of ink. Will you choose black, blue or red in this calligraphy challenge?
The studio has also announced that a DLC pack will be available within the first six months of the title’s release, containing the following:
- Paper grade upgrades
- Clean up spilled ink with touchscreen controls
- Added character hand options
- And much more!
Toilet cleaning simulator
For this they distributed scratch cards at the press event. A fun gimmick, yes, but it couldn’t have been Bread Baking Sim instead of this?
In this simulation, you can swing both Joy-Cons at the same time while you bleach, scrub, and wipe down some of the dirtiest toilet bowls in the world. If it sounds disgusting, that’s because it is.
Game modes include Plunger Time Trial, Tough Scrub Co-op, and Suspicious Stain Mystery Round. Look, we won’t judge – that’s what it sounds like very Interesting. And if you like that, then we have another sim for you!
Toilet cleaning: double flush!
That’s right, with an IP as hot as toilet cleaning simulator, the studio has already confirmed the game’s sequel, double flush!
This seems fairly similar to its predecessor and might work better as standard DLC, although the additional Find The Blockage mini-game promises to be fun for the whole family. Exactly what that means is yet to be determined, but this one lets our imaginations run wild.
DISHWASHER – loading
We’re not exactly sure what they wanted with the title here (come on, it’s like we just made that up!), although the futuristic feel of the capital letters and hyphen certainly interested us.
Like Surgeon Simulator, but with a dishwasher as a sacrifice, you have to be careful with how much stuff (and what) you load this machine with. It’s all a balancing act trying to manage and maintain your dishwasher to ensure you always have perfectly pristine dishes.
Here is the officially Game synopsis from the developers Machine Wash Only:
Take the joy of loading a dishwasher to the next level in DISHWASHER – Loading! Get the most out of your tablets by stacking plates, bowls, pans and cutlery just right for the perfect clean. But be careful: If you overload the dishwasher, muesli residues will end up in the spoons! It’s like real washing but without the joy of eating!
Nose pick simulator
Only at one event where we checked out two toilet cleaning simulator promos could this feel like a slight relief. Think WarioWare’s Gold Digger mini-game and you’re just getting started.
Perhaps the most luck-based simulation announced during the show, Nose pick simulator will utilize the Switch’s touchscreen capabilities while clearing your avatar’s nostrils of any unwanted dwellers.
While the game is still in beta, the studio was able to provide us with the following list of features:
– Digging for gold: Dive deep and browse the Switch’s first nose simulator!
– Pick it, roll it, flick it: The game does not end once you have determined a winner. Scan the room with motion controls and choose the ultimate location to film! behind the couch? In the sink? on the cat? It’s your decision!
– nose accessories: Choose from a range of piercings, tattoos and hair lengths to make this nose simulation as lifelike as possible!
With all of these very real title will definitely come to change, we can’t help but wonder if we’ve missed something. Let us know more absolutely confirmed 100% realLife sims in the comments below!
#totally #real #life #simulators #Switch